Chapter 16:
Back home a week or so later
As it turned out his aussies were overjoyed to see him and acted as if nothing had ever happened. But again, how could Dan go on now. It was bad enough losing Ronnie the first time in the real world, but now to lose her again this way was overwhelming. He had talked with the psyche people at the hospital and they had tried to be helpful, but it didn’t seem to be of much use.
In the days and then weeks and even months that followed Dan had talked with his Dad and Mom every day. It was the one piece of reality in the fabric of time that helped him maintain his sanity. They had asked: 'What will you do now?' He had said: 'I don’t think I can stay on the ranch alone anymore.'
He stared out the kitchen window watching the humming birds battle for a sip of the sugary liquid from the feeder. He noticed his cats running and jumping through the tall grass as they attacked each other in play. He glanced toward the mantel to see if the burial urn was there. Of course, it wasn’t. It had been lost in the bay during the blast. He worried about that. He had hoped to keep that small memento with maybe a trace of Ronnie's remains.
Dan was sure that the ashes would have been carried all over the ocean in time if he had just been able to carry out his appointed mission. But, to be spread about in an enormous explosion. What would be the consequences of that. In the end he decided it probably didn’t matter one way or the other. After all he had accomplished his task, just not the way he had intended. There had been no special words spoken in secret. There had been no tears shed during a little ceremony. And there had been no prayer uttered to send her on her way either. It just seemed to be another chapter in the book of ‘Wrong’ that had been Ronnie’s life ending affair.
As Dan wandered through the house he peeked into each of the rooms marveling at how the brain works. It was amazing to him that such an incredible tale could be concocted in his psyche. It had not rained in several weeks now but there was no hint that he would ever see Ronnie again the way he had before. I guess they're right, he thought, I imagined the whole thing. He knew that as long as he remained in this place he would continue to keep trying to conjure up her apparition. As this revelation finally sunk in, he decided that he would sell the ranch if he could, and move back to Oregon. It would be hard on everyone, but he had to break the chain of events that had been his ‘Two’ lives now.